I’m Trying, Even When It Doesn’t Look Like It 😪

I’m Trying, Even When It Doesn’t Look Like It 🧠💭

I want to say this clearly.

If anyone got hurt because of my anger,
I’m sorry. 🙏

I never wanted to hurt anyone with my words.
Sometimes pressure comes out the wrong way,
and I’m owning that.

I try to be calm.
I try to be disciplined.
I try to be strong.

But sometimes I lose control —
not because I don’t care,
but because I care too much.

Too many expectations.
Too many voices.
Too little space to breathe. 😮‍💨

Teachers expect results.
Parents expect success.
People expect maturity.

I feel like I’m always being watched,
always being measured,
always being compared.

And when I fail once,
it feels like everything I did right disappears.

That pressure builds.
And sometimes… it explodes. 💥

I’m disappointed about school.
Not because I hate learning but because I feel alone there.

Teachers I respected left.
Things I cared about slowly disappeared.
And I’m still expected to move on like nothing happened.

I try.
But some days, it hurts.

The hardest part is this:
I don’t even know what I’m missing.

I’m not ungrateful.
I have support.
I have opportunities.

Yet sometimes, there’s this quiet emptiness inside me.
Not loud. Just heavy. 🧱

Even on days when I feel lost,
even when my anger disappoints people,
even when I disappoint myself

I’m still here.

I’m trying to learn control instead of explosion.
Discipline instead of drama.
Growth instead of ego. 🧘‍♂️

I’m not perfect.
But I’m trying.

And today, that’s enough.

You don’t have to agree with me.
You don’t have to excuse my mistakes.

Just know this:
I’m learning.
I’m growing.
And I’m choosing not to give up. ❤️